First date advice
For when meeting someone for
the first time when looking for love
Two First Date Advice Tips!
The power of the first date should never be underestimated on the influence it can have on our emotions and behaviours. With the excitement of meeting someone new comes the expectation that they could be the one we are looking for. With these emotions within us driving our expectation levels we can have the tendency to accommodate others that we shouldn’t. So when you’re on that first date and you start to get to know the other person it’s important to remember two things that help lead to love. Acceptance of others and compromise. Although you may not fully understand someone completely after the first date you can get an indication of your compatibility with them and apply the first date advice below to determine if this really could lead to something serious.
First Date Advice
Rule One - Never Demand Change
If you meet someone and in many ways they work for you and the attraction exists then that’s great. However if they have something you would like to change and that something is part of their fundamental characteristics then you have to ask the question:
Do I have the right to demand someone changes?
Or do you merely have the right to
decide how much time you spend with them. Once we start to try to change others
we can expect friction. I am sure many people have learnt this lesson the hard way, I certainly didn't understand this concept for a long time in my search for love. If we understand and accept that others are what they are and we have no right or responsibility to change them, it releases us from demanding something of ourselves that we cannot achieve. Since I have truly understood this concept my human relations have become much calmer I simply do not expect others to change - they are who they are - but I do decide on how much time I want to spend with them. So if they are not fitting in comfortably with your expectations the first date advice is to consider if you wish to continue seeing them or find someone who does fit.
First Date Advice
Rule Two - Never Over Compromise
Stay True To Yourself!
As discussed in our relationship advice article we
all have to compromise to a degree or we would never agree on so many
different things. If we over compromise ourselves we can potentially become unhappy or
anxious. If we can’t both agree on a shade of blue when we have 40
different shades in front of us in a DIY store then how would we potentially
deal with the more serious choices in life. If we have to over compromise with someone we are setting ourselves up for failure and another potential disaster.
If you are looking to start dating online our best first date advice is to find a site that suits you. There are generally two types of online sites, flirting websites which is much more open adult orientated and love match making which is used by those looking for a long term relationship. You will also need to learn creating an online profile, how to identify the good from the bad and much more to find love.
Oprah Expert: Michael Webb
5 First Date Mistakes and How To Avoid Them
You never get a second chance to make a first impression! That's why, if you want to take things further with with your date, you need to show them your best on the very first date. And in actual fact, there are 5 things that people consistently do on first dates that totally destroy their chances of seeing them again, and the worst part is they think they're doing it right! Our first date advice explains how to avoid the following 5 mistakes to increase your chances of success on your first date:
MISTAKE #1 - BUYING GIFTS
Bringing chocolate or flowers on a first date isn't the best idea - especially if you've just met them! She's there to get to know YOU. Women are always asking themselves "what does THAT mean?" And in this case it's, "He bought me flowers because he likes me, but he doesn't even know anything about me yet! A little suspicious.
MISTAKE #2 - BEING MR. SERIOUS
When in the presence of a potential date, men often become boring, instead of keeping up the friendly vibe they have with their friends. They won’t make jokes or laugh with the woman, they won’t play around like they do with their friends and they generally take things a little too seriously. Why do men change their behaviour around women, often without even realising they’re doing it? Because they fear losing their only chance with the girl of their dreams, they try and play the safe side, which results in a “Mr. Serious.”
MISTAKE #3 - CONDUCTING AN INTERVIEW
When men become "Mr. Serious" they often fall into "job interview conversation mode." Make sure you reserve questions like, "So where do you work?" or "How many brothers and sisters do you have?" for the future, after you've already had a lot of fun and made the sparks fly. Instead, talk about your hobbies, interesting stories and fun stuff. Avoid anything too deep for a long period of time. On a first date, it can make things a little depressing. Talk like you've known each other for years (as if you don’t need to do the awkward 20-questions quiz.) Of course you can ask basic questions, but never make it the main focus of your date. Focus on fun.
MISTAKE #4 - BEING TOO NEEDY & DIRECT
Without realising it, many guys turn their dates off by trying a little too hard. For example: Men will lean into a woman’s personal space, and ask, "so do you like me?" or constantly change his opinion to seek her approval and make her like him. Big mistake. Ironically, it's leaning back, staying cool and calm, being a little cheeky, interesting, mysterious and comfortable with yourself that actually gets a woman's attention and keeps her interested.
MISTAKE #5 - GOING TO BORING PLACES
If your date finds the night boring, you're finished. When it comes to having fun on first dates, nothing is more important than what you do. And while dinners and movies are nice, it's really hard to leave a great impression in these settings. Why? Because they set a very "proper tone" that's hard to turn into fun and playful. And unless you're a super funny, intelligent and interesting guy, dinner and movie dates just aren't the best place to take your date. Instead, go to fun places like mini-golf parks, carnivals, parks, or even better, come up with your own unique and fun ideas.
So in essence, while there are many factors to having a successful date, a great date idea really helps you do many of them naturally! Remember, where you take a woman on a first date can be the difference between a great night and a dating disaster! Choose wisely!
Oprah Expert Michael Webb is the author of 300 Creative Dates, a book jam-packed with unique first date advice to help leave a great first impression without breaking the bank!
To learn more visit:
Share Your Thoughts
|
|
 |
Recent Articles
|
Return To The Dating Guide Articles
